“Baby baby, I brought you your toast again.”
Def annoyed her.
i like to remind her every time her phone rings that its likely, for her.
“you should get that, i think thats for you” x 17 years
I will ask if she wants a drink, then request she makes me one too when she says yes.
I never offered to make it, only asked if she WANTED one.
I will then go make her a drink of course, and I’m not sure she’s ever found it funny, but I’m amused.
I do that with everyone that tells me “I’m going to the bathroom”
I reply with “Good luck! 👍”
I usually say “have fun”
I say either but my favourite is “may the Force be with you”
I look her in the eyes romantically, with a touch of mischief, and state “you’re a very useful girlfriend”.
I only do it a couple times a year at most.
The look of disdain is priceless.
She knows I love the hell out of her, and the anti climax is brilliant.
“What am I?! Your bloody house cleaner?!”
Then we laugh. Cuddle. She feigns a cold shoulder.
Too much fun.
Whenever I let out a big fart close to her I say her name out loud in a surprised tone accompanied by “that’s absolutely disgusting!” and she eye rolls immediately lol
She squirms when I gently mess with the little ringlets of hair on the back of her neck. It’s cute.
Sometimes when she tells me she’s going to do… anything, really, I just say something along the lines of “no”, “out of the question” or “you’re not allowed to do that”. Almost 15 years later, it didn’t get old - for me! - yet. As for her, I think at this point she just tuned out these things hahaha
When I leave her, just to go to the bathroom, or to the store or leave her in the car while I go into the store, I’ll say, “See you tomorrow” x 15 yrs
Sometimes when I come back into the room from the bathroom I’ll ask if she missed me.
Me (about to head down to the kitchen): Do you want anything from downstairs?
Him: No.
Me: Just me?
Him (with a sigh and a laugh): Yes, just you.
x19 years
I’m single, so I have to settle to annoying everyone else around me by pretending like I’m going to start talk about politics
Works every time
I no longer say these because of reasons…
“why do we argue so much when we both know you are wrong”?
“if you promise to love me forever then I promise to let you love me forever”.
Her aim has improved alot during this marriage.
How about your dodging skill? Mine improved a lot.
Recently I’ve developed a new skill called “Catch”, that sure annoyed her even more.
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Everytime someone sneezed, and she says “Gesundheit”, I quietly ask her, “Did you just say Kazoo Tight?”.
When she’d say “I guess” I’d pretend to have heard “heck yes” and get excited. Then I started with my kids. Now my daughter does it to her own friends and I’ve never been more proud
Whenever she tells me she’s going to do something I react “Hey honey, you should go and do something.”
“I’m going to the store to grt some milk”
“You know what? You should go to the store and get some milk”
I am going to write you a reply “Sometimes I think about narrating my own life” I said to myself as I finished typing.
Texted my wife to tell her I was heading to a mate’s place for “a dip in the pool and some pizza”, then followed up with a texted stream of consciousness, one line at a time, about how I was planning to eat the pizza - not dip in it, then pondering what dip on pizza would be like, followed be weighing up the pros and cons of about 4 or 5 different dips on pizza, and the different pizzas they might work on.
It took about 7 or 8 messages before I got her eyeroll response. Worth it.
I sneak up behind her and give her “tiger rubs”, which is aggressive up & down motion on the ribs & side meat.
She loves if x20 years
