Which side of the bed is the left side? Is the answer based on the perspective of laying in the bed (person’s head at the head end)? Is the answer based on viewing it from the foot of the bed, looking at the head of the bed? Is there an “anatomical position” or special terminology like in boating for this?

For context: My boyfriend and I can’t agree on this. We change who gets which side based on the shoulder we’d predominantly sleep on and how it’s feeling. This let’s us get good cuddles before shoulder pain gets irritated. He comes to bed after me. A while back he asked what side I’m sleeping on. I said “left”. Later that night, he comes in and almost lays directly on me because he claims “left” is the other side. Since then we have to describe which side using complicated descriptions.

    • MrsDoyle@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      This is the correct answer. It’s how ships avoid running into each other. When whoever is steering the vessel is facing the bow (front, usually the pointy bit), port is their left, starboard their right. Ship’s running lights are red on the port side, green on the left. So if you’re out on the water at night, you can immediately see whether a ship is coming towards you or moving away. The rule for passing an oncoming vessel is “port to port”, thus avoiding confusion and collision.

      Sitting up in bed I would consider the headboard the stern, because I have my back to it, and the foot the bow. So the area to starboard is right, and portside is left. Ahoy maties!!!

  • all-knight-party@kbin.run
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    4 months ago

    I’d say it’d be from the perspective of laying in it, since no one cares what side of the bed is which unless they’re going to lay in it

  • RizzRustbolt@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    No right or left.

    Window side or door side.

    If this doesn’t apply to your bed, then you have aligned the bed improperly.

  • TostiHawaii@feddit.nl
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    4 months ago

    If you lay in the bed, depending on if you are lying on your back or stomach, left and right still change.

    Ususally a bed is positioned with the head against a wall, so if you are facing the bed from the foot end, left and right are always the same. So I vote left/right is as seen from the foot end of the bed.

    • Mostly_Harmless_Variant@lemmy.worldOP
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      4 months ago

      You’re in agreement with my BF.

      I didn’t consider stomach sleepers. It’s a good counter. I sleep on my stomach for short periods of time, but laying prone isn’t default orientation (we typically don’t face the ground) so therefore shouldn’t be used as an indicator of default direction.

      How do you reference position while in the bed? Just “your vs my” side?

  • BaumGeist@lemmy.ml
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    4 months ago

    take a cue from the theater folk: stage left/right is defined by the performers’ perspective. Call it “bed left” and “bed right” to talk about it from the perspective of someone on the bed, and “standing left” or “standing right” to talk about the perspective of someone looking at the bed

    Although it’s kinda silly to me that anyone’s default orientation would be from looking at the bed, which is not the position most commonly associated with the thing famous for laying in it.

    • Mostly_Harmless_Variant@lemmy.worldOP
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      4 months ago

      Nice job renaming stage and audience to bed and standing. I would’ve used their original terms. Our bed is not a stage and we don’t entertain an audience so that would’ve gotten weird/entertaining at some point.

      And absolutely agree. I was dumbfounded when he said otherwise. There’s a good few who agree with the logic. Personifying the bed breaks that logic though.

    • nixcamic@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      But that’s the position you most commonly look at a bed from. And when figuring out where you’re gonna get into the bed.

      Like the only time you actually use the information about sides of bed is from the perspective of outside the bed.

      • BaumGeist@lemmy.ml
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        4 months ago

        that’s another flaw: standing left only conflicts with bed left if you’re standing at the foot. At the head they’re the same. On either side, it’s an arbitrary decision.

        Whereas bed left will always be the same side of the bed regardless of its shape, its orientation in the room, or your position in relation to it.

  • UnPassive@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    To avoid confusion, just say driver and passenger side.

    I meant this to be a joke, but if you assume your bed drives forward toward the side with your pillows then it actually works. But if you read in bed with a reading pillow then I guess you probably want to drive your bed toward your feet side of the bed…

    • Mostly_Harmless_Variant@lemmy.worldOP
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      4 months ago

      Driver and passenger side confuses me more because of your last point. It’s backwards. But it still needs to be named foot of the bed and not head because it’s where it feet go. So your first point also makes sense. Both are right and wrong at the same time

  • RBWells@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    I have a problem with right and left, and this question illustrates it pretty well. I tend to give directions as east, west, north, south. Left and right move around when you do, so can’t really be assigned to stationary items like a bed. Our bed has a northwest side and a southeast side.

    • Mostly_Harmless_Variant@lemmy.worldOP
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      4 months ago

      Left/right are ambiguous terms.

      Your solution would be a great way to practice spatial awareness. Could get exhausting constantly reorienting to where is north, but would benefit us in any post apocalyptic future.

      • RBWells@lemmy.world
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        4 months ago

        My dance teachers always gave up and started using directions like “toward the mirror, towards the back wall, toward the door, toward the window” because right or left always a slight pause while I was figuring out which is which, and probably not just me. Once the dance was learned it was fine. Jazzercise teachers have to announce backwards (yell right when they are themselves going left), they wanted me to teach but sure it would break my hold on R/L entirely.

        Driving it’s easier, left is the side with oncoming traffic here. But when giving directions I’m not driving and revert to the N,S,E,W - I am not a compass, just lived here a long time, I had a friend who was a compass, you could blindfold her, spin her around a bunch till dizzy and she could still find north, blindfolded.

  • JackbyDev@programming.dev
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    4 months ago

    Imagine you are driving the bed. If you lean up you’re looking forward. You could call them driver and passenger side based on this. Sort of like port and starboard lol.

  • Professorozone@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    I have no idea. Like others I usually request the side closest to the bathroom since I go during the night more often than her. I could see it either way.

  • FMT99@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    My girlfriend lies on my right arm, so she’s on the right side of the bed and I’m on the left.