Blow some cannabis smoke in my face and point me in the direction of a comfortable chair. Now it’s a chill hangout session, not a boss fight. But you still win.

Completion reward: let’s share some pretzels

Ask nicely if they can scooch past. Id be mortified that I was in the way at all.

Ask me about something I’m above average knowledged about that I’m also interested in, and then you can disarm the bomb, save the pricess, destroy my entire species before I’m done oversharing the introductory part or even its preface.

They’d probably handle me the same way as the fish boss in Earthworm Jim. Just one smack to the face and I’m done. That’s all it takes.

Steady, unrelenting emotional abuse.

Wait out my timer or go around me.

Attack at dawn.

idk probably like detaching my brain stem with a hammer or something

Show me the error in my ways so I can learn from it, or transform me from bad to good.

⚠️ wet floor ⚠️

I was driven mad by the unrelenting noises of society. The clamor, the insanity of humanity. The protagonistic figure decides a more peaceful option is adequate for my type of villainy and offers me quiet respite. A lovely cottage suitable for my hermit-like needs.

With this, I am at peace. I have a home. I have quiet. No quarrels with the world anymore

Any way he choose. How would pick my as boss? That’s a very bad move.

Tell me they’re going to meet me at like 5pm, and never show.

Probably shooting the chips from cutting a log with a chainsaw at my face. That’s gotten be at some point painful and extremely annoying.

Intended method: three phase fight where the PC must break a magic shield before I get off a spell (DPS check). Breaking the shield releases a shockwave which either needs to be dodged or cancelled by an optional item (magic earmuffs). Failure to break the shield fails the fight, sends them to the room before (fuck you watch the whole cutscenes again)

Pacifist method: compliment me a couple of times and I won’t know what to do with myself. I teleport away, leaving the key