I’m sure they made $600 million through this breech somehow?

This is horrible. I’m going to download a bunch of these PDFs so that there are less copies available for other dishonest people to download.

I’m doing my part!

The nuerodivergent part suggests you’re going to just need to be direct.

“I really enjoy our friendship, it’s important to me. I want to make sure we keep that friendship regardless, but I’ve also realized I might be developing more romantic feelings for you that I’d like to explore together - maybe you’ve had thoughts/feelings like that about me before? If not, that’s cool, I just feel better having said it to you so it’s out of my head :) but yeah, I like you and I’d like us to get dinner on an actual date date sometime and see how we both feel. What do you think?”

Or there’s always Margaret Cho’s technique…

New textbooks have disappearing ink that only lasts, about one semester, until a month before finals, and then in that month they trigger dynamic pricing increases due to a stronger than typical demand…

Just whatever makes sense

“We’d love to not pay you for labor!!!”

:)

Check check, check da emails!!!

And if we weren’t a big, broken mess of late stage capitalist hellscape, you or someone you know could have actually benefited from this.

Duct tape your heart to someone else’s heart, double heart, so EASY. DOCTORS HATE!!!

“I’m an idiot who hates myself, and especially hates my real and potential kids and grandkids”

All trump voters interviewed as they leave the polls.

Willy Wonka, I invoke thee… please come express my feelings on this for me.

App controlled shoes aren’t the outlier though by any means? Just about everything has a companion app these days and through enshitification they eventually lock away features and charge subscription (if they didn’t from start) until they inevitably shut down servers and brick devices or at lady severely restrict usability.

The android community often revives these products, giving them a second life and retaining their core functionality at least - because the platform allows for it in its design.

This same thing doesn’t happen in the box, because the box doesn’t want its friends ability to pull the plug denied them. Again this is objective fact at this point and ubiquitous to the point that you routinely see casual reference to this style of joke.

And to “most people will never use X functionality” that’s a self fulfilling prophecy because most people in the box have never known those features as any kind of possibility. “Most people held hostage in a basement from birth, fed only saltines, won’t want Oreo cookies” is the same idea.

See, just stumbled across this on another thread, you box folk are just the open butt of the joke everywhere…

For those that can afford to enter the box and maintain all of its required ancillary pieces, you may very well be able to have that experience and save yourself “the burden” of thought or choice, yes.

Voting is hard too, having to research multiple candidate’s histories against their stated intentions, marketing and funding sources can be downright exhausting at times, maybe you can let Apple do it for you?

Raising your kids includes so many difficult and impactful choices… Maybe we can send our kids to Apple, pay a subscription, and they can raise them as might best boost shareholder value?

It’s not shameful.

As long as you stay in your box.

Birthed by and killed by capitalism. Tone deaf retailers charging too much for not enough for too long PLUS general trend to take away “free” public places where regular people can casually gather and kill a few hours having low/no cost fun.

HP anything, absolute trash

Anything that accesses Expedia.com

With no other realized penalty for the individual? Nothing indirect?

Who the fuck still uses Twitter?

This is like a press release about a random gopher farting in the woods in Prague - this “news” is mildly relevant to a total of 7 people in the entire universe.