I’ve always said to dump me in a ditch somewhere, I’m not gonna care, I’ll be dead. If anybody pays for an expensive ass coffin for me, I will come back and haunt their ass.
You basically just rephrased multiple scenes with Frank in It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia…
“I mean, I don’t give a shit. If I was dead you could bang me all you want. I mean, who cares? A dead body is like a piece of trash. I mean, shove as much shit in there as you want. Fill me up with cream, make a stew out of my ass. What’s the big deal? Bang me, eat me, grind me up into little pieces, throw me in the river. Who gives a shit? You’re dead, you’re dead! Oh shit! Is my mic on?”
or another episode: “When I die, just throw me in the trash!”
Just thought it was funny to find people mirroring Frank Reynolds in real life… although I always pretty much agreed with him. I’m more concerned with how traumatizing it’d be for my family to see me in a ditch, and/or being filled with cream.
I had to pay the trash company to take an old couch. They sent over a special truck that ate that sofa bed in seconds and all that was left on the road were some wood splinters. That was when I knew how I wanted to be disposed of after I die.
Your body is a resource. Don’t throw it away or bury it, give it to a gothy craftsman in exchange for half the jewelry made from it going to your family. It literally triples your chances of acquiring haunting privileges.
Air frying is just a convection cremation, you know.
also free snacks for the mourning
saves a ton on catering
I told my wife that when I die, if she can, claim she doesn’t recognize the body so that the state has to dispose of me to save costs.
I love this so much lol.
I told my wife the same…repeatedly. We are Canadian though.
For when you need that last extra special grope of capitalism
Just fling me into a wood chipper, and point it at the ground in a field somewhere.
Failing that, I’ve always loved the idea of being strapped to a rocket and launched into space.
If all else fails, I’d like my family to perform a (mostly) shot-for-shot remake of the funeral scene from GoW: Ragnarok.
If all else fails, I’d like my family to perform a (mostly) shot-for-shot remake of the funeral scene from GoW: Ragnarok
Complete with ~Bear McCreary~ “Raeb” playing his hurdy-gurdy?
Of course, ideally it’d be Bear McCreary, but I’d settle for my wife learning to play it.
Just shoot me out of a cannon
Fuck yeah! Don’t even wait until I’m dead.
I’ve made it very known that I wanna be thrown in to the woods to rot when I die.
Put me on the lawn so I can finally fertlize it like I said I would.
In the mighty words of Danny devito, “when I’m dead, just throw me in the trash.”
Trash man!
Just Kobe me into the nearest dumpster/landfill.
100% compostable
@BonesOfTheMoon Funerals are bourgeoisie BS. $ 700 cremations include a cardboard box
A funeral I attended recently had a plywood coffin and a bunch of felt-tip pens for people to write messages with. At another one a while back, the coffin was wickerwork.
I used to know a guy who embalmed his own wife (yes I’m serious!) who offered to get me a deal when the time came for cheap cremation but sadly he died first.
How big is the biggest rubbermaid tote?
A hacksaw and several smaller totes are cheaper.
Hell I’d be ok with someone just throwing me into a big blender then feeding me to some pigs or something.
