One of Bob Dylans greatest achievement was understanding the importance of the Wiggle in music and he has incorporated it into many of his songs, most notably in his magnum opus, “Wiggle Wiggle” from 1990. Experts and scientists are still in disagreement as to whether or not the song “Wilbury Twist”, from a band Dylan was in, is the greatest song of all time, but they agree that, as James Joyce noted, “the Wiggle is strong in that one.”

Because of these songs Bob Dylan is the only songwriter in history to have been rewarded the Nobel prize for the literature. In his speech after receiving the prize Dylan could not stop talking about Moby Dick. Personally I think the genius that is Bob Dylan used Moby Dick as an inspiration for his music because the movement of the whale when swimming is a Wiggle: with this speech he once more showed the world that the Wiggle is what “keeps music moving forward”.

Ah, the whale! What a beautiful metaphor for music! Oh man! Admire and model thyself after the whale!

I know I am in the right, because the only ones arguing against the truth I have revealed do not bring forth arguments, but use “ad hobbitem” instead. No sense, no respect, just blindly following Bilbo’s lies!

Exactly! You can see that even Frodo and the boys, the ones most corrupted by Bilbo’s indoctrination, admire her courage. Frodo even gives her Bag-End at last, probably after he found out about what really happened. And while Lobelia was seen as a hero, Bilbo was literally the most controversial Hobbit of his time!

The only pay I need is justice; the only food I need is truth; the only drink I need is apple juice. Lobelia is just a Hobbit, a widow even late in her life! Nowhere in the books is any mentions of women working in the Shire, nor of any pension funds. It is fair to assume that the poor woman was in deep poverty. On top of that she was robbed of her inheritance, Bilbo making Frodo his only heir just to spite her. And here are you, talking about paying someone to defend your name ages after your death! Sometimes even a platform as glorious as Lemmy can make you lose your faith in humanity.

I know it’s just a meme, but when I see anti-Lobelia propaganda of any kind, it fills my veins with rage. Therefore I now spread the truth that Lobelia did nothing wrong, but that Bilbo framed her as a thief. Here is why:

Once upon a time, the hobbits lived peacefully in the Shire, never needing to leave their paradise, therefore never leaving it. However, one day Bilbo suddenly disappears with a wizard and some weird beard-dudes. Then he does not return.

Obviously, he is dead. So his family inherits his estate, among other things, and Lobelia moves into Bag-End.

Now Bilbo is returning from his adventure in the Hobbit. While vibing with Gollum, he had taken the ring of power, and now he comes back to his home. What he sees here horrifies him: His own home is being taken by Lobelia! This fills him with rage.

To understand matters fully, we must understand the power of the One Ring, as well as Bilbo’s psychology. The power of the ring, as is clear in the LOTR books, lies in corrupting the mind. However, we can point to a specific type of corruption: possession. This is logical, as Saurons goal was to possess all of Middle-Earth. You can see this influence of the ring with Frodo becoming paranoid, being mad at Sam for taking the ring.

Now Bilbo. He never went outside the Shire, the only place he calls home. He is continuously among strangers and obviously longs for home. Now when he finally comes home, he sees that this home is taken from him. With the ring already corrupting him he cannot think clearly and therefore doesn’t see how it is logical that others would think he is dead.

But the ring doesn’t stop corrupting Bilbo’s mind. He spins a fake tale to justify his possession of the ring and doesn’t even trust his best friend Gandalf.

Now the question is: why would he only care about posessing the ring? The rings power can’t solely lie in this, for then it would be useless to Sauron. The only logical conclusion is that he became more paranoid every day and started justifying himself in all his possessions.

Now to the point: Bilbo, paranoid as he was, tried to attack Lobelia in every way. She was a selfish person, always trying to get Bilbo’s house and his furniture and what not. Most notably, he said that Lobelia took his spoons, without providing any evidence.

The only thing that we can really say about Lobelia personality is her conversation with Frodo and the second-to-last chapter. The conversation with Frodo does put her in a bad light, but we must remember that Frodo was heavily influenced, or rather indoctrinated, by Bilbo, so this can’t be seen as an objective source. This means the only thing we know about Lobelia is that she was the most courageous of all Hobbits in fighting Saruman and his gang.

If you have mad it this far, I am sure you have been convinced of this truth, and if not, I invite you to give your arguments so that I can crush them.

Tl;dr: Lobelia was right